Healing Exercises

Good morning! Spring is progressing well in Southern Ontario. The leaves are just about to burst forth. It’s been so encouraging for everyone’s mind, heart, and soul to see this!

Recently, on my office bookshelf, I found a book called The Mother Loss Workbook: Healing Exercises for Daughters. Although it is a book written for women who lost their mothers when they were children or teenagers, I have found most of the exercises are applicable, or I can easily adapt them, to suit my situation. So far, I have written about the details of my own childhood and adolescence, and about what I know about my Mom’s childhood, adolescence and adult life before and after meeting my Dad. Next, I wrote about the relationship between my Mom and me. The journal prompts really helped me to flesh out the details of that relationship. The final prompts in that section were - Who was your mother to you? Who were you to her? Fascinating! Finally, I was invited to consider how my family operated, how my Mom and Dad related, and what our family’s values were.

This process has been like a mini Life Review. I love that there’s lots of space in the workbook to write out my answers to the prompts. It’s been comforting to pick the book up each morning and consider the next few questions.

One fascinating thing I have found is that now, when someone asks me about my Mom’s passing, I am feeling less emotionally affected. I seem to be able to answer a question using my mind, rather than coming solely from my heart. That’s been a good shift for me. It’s as though both my emotions and my mind need time to work through things, and I think the end result will be a healthier integration of everything. I have felt validated about the immensity of losing one’s Mother, and about the amount of processing required. I still feel that the best approach is slow and easy, gentle and spacious. Now I am at the point of beginning to enjoy the journey. That’s a great spot to be!